The Jobsworth Olympics
Matthew Lorenzo experienced some typical 'Jobsworth' moments during the Olympic cycle race test.
4 Sep 2011, 16:53
The London Games represents so much to so many: starting with my 11-year-old sports mad son Joe who has spent more than half of his life looking forward to next Summer. Joe is a would-be athlete, Stratford next year represents the top of the mountain for so many real competitors: that’s why the Olympics is the biggest sporting event on Earth – at some time somewhere someone is reaching the pinnacle – or zenith – of his of her life. The other attractions are well-documented, a chance to regenerate a depressed part of town, a time for national pride, an “I was There” moment for anyone who survived that lottery of a lottery for tickets…
But the other day I encountered another team who are girding their fluorescent lime-clad loins in anticipation of the great event: Team Jobsworth. And Team Lorenzo came up against the guardians of the rulebook in some force when we tried to watch the London Surrey test cycle race earlier this month.
We chose Putney as our first viewing point. There were crowds on one side of the road but hardly anyone across the street. But we weren’t allowed to cross. The race was worming through Chelsea (three miles away) but it was deemed unsafe to make the eight yard dash. Ten minutes later the riders themselves were past in flash. But it was the motorcade which preceded them which caught the eye. I counted more than 30 police bikes – more than the Pope got as I recall – along with various team support cans, unmarked police cars and a number of unexplained spectator vehicles. The best component was the AA motorcycle repair truck – probably essential with that number of bikes on the road.
We gave up and took our silver wristbands to the Mall. Joe had won four VIP tickets after representing Wandsworth in the London Games. We were martialled into a 200 yard long strip alongside the royal driveway. As we waited we couldn’t help but notice the number of stewards wandering aimlessly, almost as if they didn’t know what they were doing. It took three of them to divert the petrol-driven entourage down a slip road ahead of the racers.
The end of the race was properly spectacular. But we couldn’t see the podium where the trophies were presented. So we started to make our way home. Only we couldn’t. Behind us, the Mall was deserted but weren’t allowed to use it, for no given reason. In front of us lay the service road utilised ten minutes previous by Team Hanger On. That was empty too but still they kept us there, rejoicing in this early taste of Olympic class steward power.
I got home to read others had had it far worse. One woman had taken three hours to travel from Earls Court to Putney, a journey of less than three miles. South West London had been gridlocked. And the only response offered by those in charge next year was “We did warn you.”
I trust the cyclists enjoyed their test. But I hope the bureaucrats and their troops in lime green learned from theirs. Although, from past experience, I reckon the chances are fairly slim. Seeing as it would be more than their job’s worth….
But the other day I encountered another team who are girding their fluorescent lime-clad loins in anticipation of the great event: Team Jobsworth. And Team Lorenzo came up against the guardians of the rulebook in some force when we tried to watch the London Surrey test cycle race earlier this month.
We chose Putney as our first viewing point. There were crowds on one side of the road but hardly anyone across the street. But we weren’t allowed to cross. The race was worming through Chelsea (three miles away) but it was deemed unsafe to make the eight yard dash. Ten minutes later the riders themselves were past in flash. But it was the motorcade which preceded them which caught the eye. I counted more than 30 police bikes – more than the Pope got as I recall – along with various team support cans, unmarked police cars and a number of unexplained spectator vehicles. The best component was the AA motorcycle repair truck – probably essential with that number of bikes on the road.
We gave up and took our silver wristbands to the Mall. Joe had won four VIP tickets after representing Wandsworth in the London Games. We were martialled into a 200 yard long strip alongside the royal driveway. As we waited we couldn’t help but notice the number of stewards wandering aimlessly, almost as if they didn’t know what they were doing. It took three of them to divert the petrol-driven entourage down a slip road ahead of the racers.
The end of the race was properly spectacular. But we couldn’t see the podium where the trophies were presented. So we started to make our way home. Only we couldn’t. Behind us, the Mall was deserted but weren’t allowed to use it, for no given reason. In front of us lay the service road utilised ten minutes previous by Team Hanger On. That was empty too but still they kept us there, rejoicing in this early taste of Olympic class steward power.
I got home to read others had had it far worse. One woman had taken three hours to travel from Earls Court to Putney, a journey of less than three miles. South West London had been gridlocked. And the only response offered by those in charge next year was “We did warn you.”
I trust the cyclists enjoyed their test. But I hope the bureaucrats and their troops in lime green learned from theirs. Although, from past experience, I reckon the chances are fairly slim. Seeing as it would be more than their job’s worth….
Comments (2)
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Nice article, thanks for the information.
05/09/2011 06:47Enjoyed the article. Jobsworths are an annoyance, but the member of the Olympic family i am really looking forward to hearing from is the Local Councillor desperate to make a name for themselves. Any day now I am expecting a story about a call for the cyclists to obey the traffic lights on the race route. Better still, a campaign for cycling, sailing and rowing to banned from the Olympics because they are too middle class and not inclusive enough. If we get to The Games without some publicity hungry, sense of humour bypass non-entity from Local Government trying a stunt like this, I'll be after a decent head gear recipe.
06/09/2011 01:15