I thought the THIS WEEK sofa had plumbed the depths when Jade Goody's posterior was invited to grace it. I was wrong. I've just caught up with this week's show. I am still trying to recover from the fact that Timmy Mallett was a guest. Here's his opening piece of insightful analysis....

Andrew Neil: Are we good in this country, or bad at positive thinking.
Timmy Mallett: Wow, I've no idea. I don't really think about that particularly.
Andrew Neil: Are we a nation of pessimists?
Timmy Mallett: No, I'd like to say, er, we like to say the glass is half full except when we're at the bar I suppose, when we're at the bar and someone else as got the round in, in which case we say it's half empty and I'll have another pint please...

Do you think the THIS WEEK producers meet up each week and have a competition to think: who is the most ludicrous person we can invite on? Whoever had the bright idea of Timmy Mallett must have won by a landslide! Coming next week: Tyrone from Coronation Street.

Point of info: I wrote this before I discovered on Wikipedia that in 2002, Timmy Mallett forced West Ham United Football Club to stop selling copies of their mascot, Herbie the Hammer, in their club shop after he complained that it looked too similar to Pinky Punky. How very dare he.